Best Food Network Chefs: Male

For a lead in to this post, check my previous post. Without further ado, here are the three male Food Network chefs that I would want to cook for me.
3. Emeril Lagasse
Specialty: Cajun
Emeril is known for his Louisiana-influenced cooking style and his pattented "Bam!" in his cooking show. (Fun fact: He used to tape multiple shows during the same day and they would occasionally tape late into the night, so Emeril would yell "Bam" to wake his cameramen up.) Emeril is very solid, but I worry a little bit about the spices in his foods. I do like a good spicy food, but not all the time
2. Bobby Flay
Specialty: American
Flay is an awesome chef and master of the barbecue and would be an excellent chef. But the bottom line is he can't hold a candle to the next guy.
1. Mario Batali
Specialty: Italian
Maybe I'm a hypocrite for choosing Batali, who is the premier Italian chef on the food network, when he has not shown the ability to diversify like some of his predecessors on the list. But he is that good at cooking. I once saw him make bark look delicious. (That's a lie, but I bet you he could. He's that good.)

Best Food Network Chefs: Female

I maintain gender equality in all workplaces. I grew up living with my mother, three sisters, my grandma and even a female dog. My dad and I were on our in and often outnumbered by the estrogen-driven household.
That being said, I do not think that there are many professions that women can't do, with maybe the exception of king(fast forward to the 2:15 mark). But in my experience, women are generally better at cooking. That being said, the guys on food network are also very good (as can be expected from people that are paid to cook.) But I decided that the women and men on the Food Network need to have separate rankings.
If I could pick a female Food Network chef to cook for me for the rest of my life, here are my choices.
3. Giada DeLaurentiis
Specialty: Italian
I have written about the cranially heavy cook before (I still contend her dome is visible from space), and she specializes in Italian food, my well-documented personal favorite. So why is she not number 1 or at least 2? Well first of all, she annoys me when she pronounces mozarella cheese all italian-y, like mosssarelllllla. Second of all, and more importantly, she doesn't she me the versatility I need from an everyday chef. I'm sure she's capable of it, but I need to see it to believe it. Until then, she will have to settle on coming out of the bullpen.
2. Paula Deen
Specialty: Southern Comfort Food
You think of Paula Dean and what do you think of? The answer: butter. Paula is a southern belle (and active tweeter, apparently) and specializes in making the delicious food that your body hates you for eating (in no small part due to her love of butter.) Paula would be number one by a landslide if a.) I could eat better and b.) I didn't want to live past to age of 50.
3. Ina Garten a.k.a Barefoot Contessa
Specialty: Everything
Garten had an interesting path to cooking, but from everything I've seen, she is very good at it. Garten makes everything well; she makes awesome desserts, she makes awesome entrees, and basically everything in between. My mom has replicated many of her recipes and I have always enjoyed them. For my money, I'm going Barefoot.

Restaurant Time

Here is a trip I made on Gowalla.com about college restaurants in the state of Ohio. These restaurants were all featured on either Man v. Food  or Diners, Drive-ins and Dives, two of the best shows on television.
And while it would be tempting to rank certain college food joints, I am going to do a broader version. Here is a ranking of the best types of food restaurants for late night eats.
Sandwich Shops
Any type of sandwich shop is a personal favorite of mine. Jimmy Johns is the most popular at Ohio but any local sandwich shop would do. In fact, I wish Ohio had a better selection of late night sandwich shops. Oh well.
Pizza
Easily the most popular choice, good college pizza is hard to find. (Unless you have had a few too many Natty lights, then everything tastes good.) Though I can't have cheese, I have been known to get an occasional cheese-less pizza.
Mexican
This encompasses everything from burritos to tacos to...well that's about it. Burritos in particular are some of the most popular options, but not for people hoping to help their bad stomach feeling.

What Not To Eat

In college, there are a lot of crappy food options. I once wrote in an article for college freshman that there are two guarantees in college: you will eat crappy food and you will stay up late. Often, the two go hand and hand, with beer usually the link.
But living in an apartment has afforded me the luxury of making my own, not crappy, food. I have given a lot of alternatives to crappy food in previous posts, but here are a few tips to avoid falling victim to the crap-ola served at college. (And If you were wondering, yes I did break the record for most uses of the word crap in a blog intro. I am making up for years of not being able to say it in my house.)
Watch What You Buy 
There are good and bad versions of every food. Do not be lured in by flashy labels; actually read the nutrition label. A whole lot of sodium? Not good. Lots of saturated fat? Not so good either. Here is a link to foods processed foods to enjoy along with some restaurants. It also has healthy alternatives, but those are from the John Madden School of the Obvious.
Avoid the Cheap Stuff
For college students, hearing the word cheap is like Brett Favre hearing the name Jenn Sterger: it gets them really excited. But cheap foods are often cheap because they are very unhealthy and typically have processed foods.  This list explains the ingredients that comprise many processed foods. And to round of the processed food portion of our program, here is a list of the weirdest processed foods.
These tips may not be the most popular, but they are an easy way to eating healthier and avoiding the Freshman 15.(Or any other weight gain.)

Don't Forget the Dishes

I live with two roommate. One does a good job of maintaining a clean room and and he does his dishes, most of the time. My other roommates is quite the opposite; his room has an odd stench and he has yet to wash a dish (that's no lie.)
Now I fall somewhere in the middle. My room is not very clean but I tend to clean the dishes pretty regularly.
However, our dishes have got to a point where we have to resort to washing the bigger dishes in the bathtub. They no longer fit in our sink.
It's a sad state when you are reduced to cleaning dishes in the bathroom, so here are some links to avoid the current situation I am in.
For those like roommate #2 that does not clean, here are some basic rules for cleaning dishes.
Here is an interesting experiment by faculty at Ohio State that analyzed how clean dishes are.
Not quite related to the actual cleaning, but here is a fun, interesting blog about the terminology used in the kitchen (like washing up dishes versus cleaning.)

My next post will talk about different restaurants at the ballparks on my map.

Baseball Trip

Here is a map of a cross country baseball trip. The map will soon be updated with links to the best food in each city.

View The Cross Country Baseball Trip in a larger map

What Brett Favre Should Have Done

College kids do not get in trouble with naked cell phone pictures. They are much smarter than athletes.